I have spent the last 4 days in a Health Conference with Dr. Weil and his colleagues. I will be posting some of the things I learned over the next few days- enjoy!!

5 Things I learned today-
Today I sat among Doctors, Dietitians, CEO’s and people who are generally interested  in health and well being.  Maybe it was the air condition but when Dr. Weil spoke, I literally got goose bumps.  Not because he was saying something so inspiring ( how inspiring can a lecture on mercury in fish be after all?) but because I knew I was in the right place. I knew I was learning valuable information that would impact me for the rest of my life.  Some of the lectures were very scientific and based on a lot of research and data. At times I felt I was in a high school biology class. But, at the end of the day, I came away with a greater understanding of not only the nutritional factor in our personal lives, but what that also looks like on a global scale.  These are the top five things I learned today: 

High Fructose Corn Syrup is evil – very evil.
According to Dr. Weil , HFCG is mainly responsible for the obesity in America today.  It’s sneaky- and it’s in  more items than you think.  Manufactures put it in everything from catsup to crackers.  It’s hard to find a packaged food without HFCS in it. The biggest reason is because it interferes with the insulin levels of the body, therefore very taxing on the liver. Fructose also converts to fat more than any other sugar. Up until the early 1970’s people mainly got sugar from cane sugar or beat sugar until they started using corn.  This has also been part of the reason for the corn crop disaster of late.

Fish oil- mainly Omega 3’s are good- very good.
Omega 3’s and fish oils are everywhere you look these days – and with good reason.  Joint pain, mood enhancer, immune system, eye health and the biggest of all. . . ANTI INFLAMMATORY -The biggest and most recurring theme of modern day diseases today.  Chronic inflammation. 

***Inflammation was a recurring theme throughout the whole conference. I believe my breast cancer to be the cause of chronic inflammation throughout my body caused by environmental factors and diet.

So is green tea. . . .
Black tea is good but green tea is even  better, or maybe just more studies are being done on green tea vs. black teas.  Anyway you slice it , tea is a good thing. Some things green tea is good for:
Cancer prevention
Decreased risk of stroke
Reduced blood pressure
Anti-inflammatory
Help strengthen the body’s immune system
Protect teeth by inhibiting plaque bacteria,
 Possibly increase calories burned during everyday activities. 
 Possibly improve cognitive functions

**** Green tea was also in a separate lecture on breast and lung cancer- more on that later.
*** Green tea was also highlighted in a weight supplement lecture as being one of the only supplements that actually work in some capacity.

Research and studies are subjective and confusing.
You might be confused about this as well. One study finds that drinking alcohol increases the chance of breast cancer, yet another says that drinking wine is actually good for breast cancer.  Which is it? In looking at more cases findings, research and studies than I have ever seen in my life in one day, I have found that there are so many variables to consider in studies and research that people and large companies can spin it any way they choose.  The media is partly to blame for this.  They pick one sentence and make a headline out of it.  So when considering these studies, it is important to look at : Who did the study – if the company pays for their own study then they have the ability to spin the results any way they choose, usually making them come out smelling like a rose.  2. For how long was the study?  Anything 6 months or less is not enough time to measure adequate change.  3.  What were the other variables involved? Did everyone have the same ethnic background? What are the ages? How exactly were their diets modified? 
In the end, be wary of claims made by the media.  Look further to reputable medical sources that aren’t backed by pharmaceutical companies.

Finally and quite simply -Don’t eat anything that wasn’t around 100 years ago.
The best option is to eat whole foods- This sounds so simple – so why is it so hard?  The general rule of thumb is the longer the list of ingredients, the more you should avoid it. For example- Whole, organic yogurt is a whole food- “Gogurt” is not.  Organic granola is a whole food- Power Bars are not. Anything more than 8 ingredients should be looked at carefully.

I am looking forward to another day of healthy, alternative nutrition. Until then- eat healthy, be happy. If you have any questions- please ask! I will do my best to answer with what I know.


A little disclaimer here- I am not a doctor.  The information I have provided are translations of what I learned from professionals in the nutrition industry. They aren’t claims to ‘cures’ or meant to treat any ailments. 

I wish I didn't look -

God has given me this little gift for dealing with undesirable situations.  Some might call it blissful ignorance.  I call it healthy denial- is there such a thing as healthy denial?  I’m not sure, but in certain times of stress, I feel like an outsider looking in – until something pops me back to reality – which is what happened today.

Up until this point, I have had kind of a ’lassie faire’ attitude about my upcoming surgery.  Even talking to the surgeons about it- It just didn’t occur to me the level of deformity that was going to take place.  People kept suggesting I take a look at photos of the aftermath of a double mastectomy to soften the shock-  I didn’t look up until this point because it didn’t matter.  I knew I could do nothing about it and I can’t change what it is, so why cause myself anymore anxiety? I wish I didn’t look.

At some level I think I wanted to pretend I was just getting a modified boob job. . . yeah- not so much.  No, these stories and pictures were a harsh reality of what I left in the wake of cancer. 

I don’t think I would be human if I wasn’t a little scared , but for as much as possible in the next 10 days I am going to live in my state of denial and stop projecting into the future.  I will be knee deep in nutritional facts and organic eating for the next few days with Dr. Weil and friends.  That should keep me busy.  Wednesday is a full day of nutrition and cancer- I will be reporting back to all of you soon with my new found knowledge-

Friday was not starting out to be such a great day. I went to the airport to pick up my sister, only to find out that I had the wrong DAY.  Yes, I am still amazed how I managed to mix up days, instead of just a time or flight number, but never the less, it happened. 

I arrived at the terminal, waiting for all the people to get off the plane and I waited . . .and waited. . .and waited. . .  There were lovers reuniting,  best friends who had not seen each other in many years, families that were waiting on their dads, but my sister was not on that plane so I gave her call.  I was surprised when she answered.
 “ Hi! Are you here?” I asked
 “No.I’m at work. . . my plane doesn’t come until Monday.” She replied. 
 My sisters is a prankster so a part of me believed she was pulling a joke – but no, she was serious.
“ Monday????? Are you sure? Oh bummer. . . .” I said.
 “ Are you at the airport? “ she asked 
“ Yes, I am here waiting FOR YOU!”
“ Well, don’t wait all weekend- you should go home!”

So, I got in the car and ran some errands. First stop was the grocery.  I managed to spend my whole weekly budget within the span of 20 minutes .  How does this happen??? A.) I hate being on a weekly budget and B.) Why do we need all this food? My family must be pigs. . .  oh wait ! I have teenagers , yes, now I remember and a husband that can make an all day affair out of eating. Then there is the fact that I have decided to eat organically, which means eggs are now 5.00  a pop instead of 2.50.  I’m not sure what I’m really pissed about – the fact that food is expensive or the fact that my budget is so small- either way, it really ticks me off.
By the time I get home I’m just grouchy.  It’s hot, I’m bald and I’m just really tired of this whole cancer thing.  The only thing I can do is just sit and think. . . .and think. . . and think. . . I must have spent the next 2 hours trying to come up with ways to get out of this mess- immediately.  Big mistake. The more I started thinking, the more I got caught up in the situation.  It would have been much better to remove myself from the situation, but I felt paralyzed.

Finally it was time to leave to teach a class at the Princess.  I love this class, but even today I was complaining  about going – until I got there.  The minute I step onto the grounds and smell the aroma of the spa I am reminded how much I love my job and how much I LOVE the spa. It is magical. Suddenly, I am telling this woman how much I love my job and all the things that happened previously in the day seemed to just vanish.  I started thinking “ This is so perfect- my perfect scenario will come to me- I am exactly where I need to be right now “ and right then the Director of the Spa came in.  Nobody came to my class, so we ended up talking and talking.   She is 25 years my senior and yet we had so much in common.  She has taught Pilates for over 25 years etc. and is battling cancer – and yet you would never know this unless she told you.  She was such an inspiration! This was God’s way of letting me know- “Everything is fine- you are exactly where you need to be and doing exactly what you need to do.”
Within minutes the course of my day was completely changed by a conversation.  I was so grateful to this lady and she probably didn’t even realize it!  I walked out of the spa with a lighter heart and questioning myself how this ‘shift’ occurred.  The truth was- it came down to a shift of thinking. The minute I started talking about how much  I loved my job and being at the spa was when I opened the door for this wonderful lady to come in and enlighten me with a conversation.   Incredible.  I should do that more often.

The cool thing about cancer-
Wait- did I just say that? Are there cool things about cancer? I never thought I would hear myself say that- but I have to admit, there are some really great experiences that I have had during the last few months that I doubt I would have had otherwise.  For example, a friend of mine just travelled all the way across the country to spend a few days with me.  We saw movies, got pedicures, went to the spa and for a few short days I  forgot about this whole cancer mess. It was the greatest gift I could imagine.  Or like when my mom came for a visit and totally took care of me.  She cooked. . . and cooked. . . and cooked some more.  We played cards and went for walks.  She allowed me to be sick when I needed to be and it was a comfort knowing I didn’t have to pretend to be happy when I felt like crap. You’re never too old to miss your mom. In a week or so  my sister will come for a visit. I can’t remember the last time she and I spent time alone together.  What a blessing.

Somehow my cancer took on new meaning to the word ‘friendship’.  It has taken my relationships to a new level.  I’ve rekindled some relationships and even started new ones – I’ve even made amends to people I may have wronged along the way. All things I wish I would have done sooner. Either way, I got the lesson when I suppose I was ready for it.

I know I’m getting ahead of myself a little, I mean I’m not really out of the woods just yet, but I’ve made it so far.  Thursday was my last chemo treatment and even as the chemo aliens are invading my body for one last time, I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  The other day, I found a journal I kept from 15 years ago.  It was during a particularly hard time in my life.  I didn’t know how I was going to get out of the situation, but I kept  reminding myself  that God had a better plan for me, I just couldn’t see it right then.  Boy, was I right.  God did have a much better plan for me, one I could not have imagined on my own and that’s kind of how I feel about things now.  I’ve made it around the bend and things are starting to look up.

PS. I really need to mention that I could not have made it even this far without all of your prayers and support.  Each and every one of you who have read this blog has helped me carry this burden in some way and I sincerely thank you! Happy Easter!

Just thought I would pass these things on to you ! Be inspired!!!

The author of the documentary and book " Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips " Kris Carr has developed a community forum.  It is really full of inspiring people with cancer who are not letting cancer take over their lives. The women have all different stages, types of cancer. The site is very informative about healthy eating, do and don'ts and suportive conversations. Check it out! If you sign up , I am 'Pilates Girl' on the site-
http://my.crazysexylife.com

Also, some of you may have missed this but Deepak Chopra is on PBS.
Happiness Prescription With Deepak Chopra: Modern Insights From Buddha's Wisdom
Using the teachings of Buddha as a starting point, Deepak Chopra explains the 10 keys for achieving a happy, fulfilled life. Included: Buddha's Four Noble Truths; the Eightfold Path to Enlightenment.
You have to search http://pbs.org
under 'search programs' and find your local listing.  In Az it's not until March 14th- but others will differ. I thought it would be better than watching another episode of " American Idol"

I also came across Hay House radio - that was pretty good too.  I like to listen to music, talk shows on my computer while I'm working in my office, but the trick is to find something healthy for my ears to listen to!
Hay House has all the great inspirational speakers like Wayne Dyer, Mianne Williamson,  etc.
You have to signup, but it's free.
http://www.hayhouseradio.com/

Having cancer is especially hard for people who like to plan things.  You are at the mercy of doctors, appointment schedulers and others beyond your control.  Since you are never  sure how your body will react to things, it makes especially difficult to plan. BUT, today- yes today was a very good day. Since I am almost finished with my chemo I am able to schedule my surgery for a bilateral mastectomy.  I met with the plastic surgeon and I have the official date set for April 15th assuming everything else goes as planned. Apparently, the whole process takes 4- 5 months to complete.   I was a little disappointed that the entire process was going to take so long, but, it is what it is- I just feel lucky to move on with things.  At the time of the mastectomy they will insert ‘expanders’ and then I will go back every week or so to ‘fill them up’ until they are the appropriate size.  Maybe it will be a little less since I’m not replacing Dolly Parton’s –  The doctor was very funny, he said “ I do have to warn you, your breasts will be bigger than they are now”  “ Not a problem!” I said  “I should be able to get something out of his whole deal, don’t ya think?” So, any of you who have had expanders in please write to me and tell me your experience.  I am interested to know if and how they will affect my range of motion. The doctor said to plan on being off work and I said " Yes, but you don't know me - I really need to go back to work"

There is even more good news! I talked to the oncologist and she said I might not even need radiation.  We won’t find out until after surgery how many lymph nodes were affected and that is the deciding factor, but just the thought that I wouldn’t need radiation is such a tremendous relief.

Thursday is treatment number  7.  I’m trying not to think about it today.  I am hoping to keep my ‘good thoughts’ as long as possible.  My last treatment is on the first day of Spring.  How fitting!  The start of a new chapter in life.

The days before my treatments are always some of the best –that’s why it’s hard to believe that by Saturday I will feel like crawling into a cave and hiding. It’s even more strange to  know this is going to happen.  I try not to think about it- but it creeps up in the back of my mind.  I get all the things I need to get done, I work out the hardest and strongest and then it’s back to square one.  Oh well- so it goes.

  I feel lucky in so many ways.  The other day I got an email about a lady who had a brain tumor and sole custody of her eight year old son.  It’s not hard to look around and find someone worse off than myself. In the scope of things, I got off pretty lucky.  On days like today if I don’t glance in the mirror, I might even pretend I don’t even have cancer at all.  I guess because in the back of my mind I know I’ll be healthy again. I know all of this is just a stage in life with lessons to learn along the way. 

I am grateful for my husband.  He insists I look like Demi Moore when she shaved her head for the movie GI Jane.  The other day we were in the car at a stoplight and I had a hot flash. My wig became extremely uncomfortable.  He took one look at me and said “Just take it off!” and so I did.  The lady next to us was a little shocked so Matt puts the wig on and gives it a shake. We were all cracking up- including the lady in the car beside us.

I think about the ‘before cancer days’ when I complained about feeling tired or about all the things I ‘had’ to get done. I hope I remember the good parts about this time in my life- like how good it feels just to feel like myself.

In a few days I will feel like a monster has invaded my body- but for today, it feels good just to be me.